I’m on the road in an epic journey across the “mostly” eastern U.S. with stops in Denver, Chicago and Texas in between. Right now I’m in Orlando, Florida smack in the middle of “Americana” and tourists. And I’ve learned something I already knew, tourist suck.  Ah but travelers don’t. Travelers are cool.

I won’t get into the differences here and now as I’m short on time but I will say that South Beach in Miami, FL was full of tourists with hardly a traveler in sight.

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again.. that place has more Douchebags per square foot than any place I’ve EVER seen in my life. Miami’s South Beach is, and until further proof presents itself, the Douchebag Capital of the World and DBs the world over gather there on a regular basis to preen, pose and pretend. South Beach is so much in 1st place that there is a huge drop off between South Beach and whatever place may be in 2nd place. I’m case I’m being a bit unclear, let me please clarify again, that Soutbeach is head and shoulders the douchiest place on the planet.

Like my car? It's a rental!

Like my car? It’s a rental!

I saw douchebags in hummers (really? still?) in Bentleys, Tesslas, etc, etc. and they were jamming out to EDL or mind numbing hip hop with NBA jerseys and cheezy tattoos with a look that was screaming “look at me.. I’m so cool.. I rented an exotic car.. am I having fun yet?”… sad.. pathetic.. stunted.. arrested development.. ignorant.. these terms all came to mind.

But this is not about South Beach (really?), this is about Orlando and the cool punk newlywed couple (travelers  not tourists I might add) that I met from New Castle England thanks to the fact that the lone Tshirt for my cross country odessy is of the Rancid (the band, not the smell) variety.

They commented on my shirt, we got to talking punk music, comparing U.S. punk to British punk, from Buzzcocks to Pennywise to the Ramones and everything in between. The guys are on their honeymoon and I wanted to post a little shout out to them.

Guys, if you’re reading this, congrats again and write to me on here. Enjoy your little tour of the U.S. and please understand, though you may meet the occasional idiot, not all Americans are idiots, a’holes and douchebags (nor is everyone obsessed with calling out South Beach over their Douchebaggery like I am). Yes some North Americans (lets distinguish between our much cooler brothers down in Central and South America) are quite ok and even generous of spirit, just as I’m sure some folks are in merry Newcastle, England.

Alas, you are probably having a better time of it than I as I’m really very much over the whole cross country traveling across the U.S. thing (done it many times, ad nauseum) and I’m working with little sleep.

Anyway, just as in Miami where the gang at Churchills gave me the boost to carry on, talking just 3 or 4 minutes of punk in front of the hotel may help get me through Orlando, Atlanta and God help me, Baltimore and Washington DC this week.

Since we chatted about it, I posted the video from the Cuban Punks below. Enjoy and stay in touch and hope to see you in Newcastle when I inevitable make the journey to the UK and if you head to South Beach, well, you’ve been warned.

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